


The Place Where You Used To Live

by mollyflowa



Series: When You Were Young [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-04
Updated: 2014-09-04
Packaged: 2018-02-16 03:33:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2254305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mollyflowa/pseuds/mollyflowa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marco and Jean are both fairly old, like at least 30. Marco comes home for Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Place Where You Used To Live

**Author's Note:**

> My first JeanMarco fic that I'm actually posting. I hope you all like it, I spent a lot of time writing and a lot of deleting and editing and all of that stuff.

_And sometimes you close your eyes and see the place where you used to live_

_When you were young_

-The Killers, When You Were Young

 

I was visiting my parents for Christmas one year when I was in my early thirties. I don’t really remember what age I was or exactly what year because it wasn’t really important for me at that time. And it’s just that when details don’t matter, they just slip out of your head, you know?

 

I never did like visiting them because they would always be on my back about how I wasn’t married and that I haven’t settled down with a nice man yet, but I felt like I should spend at least Christmas together with them occasionally. I just couldn’t find anyone that I truly loved in my life and who loved me back. I mean, there was a guy once, but we grew apart. I went to med school and I don’t really know what he did. I think he got a job at some store or something after he couldn’t find a “real job” with his bachelor’s degree. Why he decided to not go to graduate school, I don’t really know. We didn’t really keep in touch. There was facebook, but he was never on.

 

My parents greeted me at the airport the afternoon of December 22nd that year. As soon as I landed, it immediately felt like home.

 

“How have you been, Marco?” my mother asked me when we got back in the car.

 

Marco, that’s me. Marco Bodt. Fairly well-off surgeon in Southern California in a little town called Jinae. Nothing too fancy. I never changed my appearance. I was a regular old Joe. I was truly a middle aged man in my opinion. Although I wasn’t actually middle aged.

 

I replied that I was “just fine, mom!” I sounded like a little kid. It was a bit embarrassing. I guess it’s hard to act like an adult when saying things like that.

 

“Any boyfriend yet?” my father asked me and I shook my head from the backseat and groaned.

“Don’t talk about that now!” I replied, pouting.

“Still haven’t gotten over Jean? Or do you have someone else that you’re working on?” my mother asked me from the front seat.

 

And with that, I remembered Jean. His gray-gold eyes shining brightly when he looked at me, his blond-black hair like gold, his face, the way he would say my name. I don’t know, I blushed.

 

“Nah, guess not,” I murmured, thinking about him.

 

Jean was only a couple of years older than me, but it didn’t matter very much. I mean, what’s a few years when you’re both middle aged? But I was so sure he was with someone else. I mean, he’s an attractive guy, why wouldn’t he be? He was still single on his facebook profile, but I frequently saw pictures of him with other girls floating around. He wasn’t posting them; he was being tagged in them, but you know, it still made me feel weird.  He looked happy in them, and I envied the girls. It was a bit shameful.

 

* * *

 

My parents and I got home fairly quickly; they lived surprisingly closer to the airport than I remembered. The way to my house was through some back road that was a bit worn down. It had a few pot holes in it. The way was bumpy and I was afraid for my life. I don’t think we took this way ever. But soon enough, we turned back onto the main road and ended up home.

 

I stayed there a little longer than a week, but it was the longest and shortest week I’ve ever experienced in my life. For starters, I moped around the house most of the days. There was nothing to do ever since the city was covered in a blanket of snow. Time moved slowly then.

 

I did go outside once, on the 23th for groceries for Christmas Eve. I bundled up in a scarf and a winter coat and everything. I mean, there was snow on the ground and it was much colder than southern California where I now lived. By like, a lot.

 

So I went to the grocery store to get things like eggs and flour for the pastries my mother would make for tomorrow and things like that. Then I saw Jean. It was weird. He was older by a lot. Well, I was older too, but he really looked aged. He had a wimpy black beard, sideburns, and black hair that was cut really short, but not enough to be a buzz cut. There was almost no trace of blond in his hair, just the slightest of a highlight. His eyes looked darker, tired, almost sad, and he had dark circles. He was wearing an old frayed jacket that looked too tight for him. It wasn’t even a winter coat, just a light jacket. Though he looked really tired and downright awful, he was still attractive as hell. I felt embarrassed even more. I had gained 20 pounds over the past 10 years or so and he hadn’t. He still looked good for the stress he looked like he put up with every day working in retail or wherever.

 

He caught me staring at him and I blushed.

 

“Marco?” he asked, driving his small shopping cart towards me eagerly. It wasn’t filled up very much, mostly things like vegetables and bread.

 

I took a slight step back with my own shopping cart. He still called my name the same way and my heart skipped a beat.

 

“Jean,” I replied quietly, barely more than a whisper.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hi.”

“How’s your life been?”

“Good! I live in California now. I’m a surgeon,” I told him, trying to look everywhere I could except for him, but my eyes kept meeting his.

“Wow, you sure made a living for yourself then,” he smiled at me weakly..

“What about you? Have a wife? Kids?” I nervously asked him. I didn’t want to accept any form of bad outcome for what he was doing. I wanted to be happy for him, I really did, but it sort of came out in the wrong way.

“Nah, none of that. Turns out, I don’t like women and I can’t really afford to adopt any kids right now. I got promoted to manager though which was pretty fucking awesome. Tough dealing with customers. I hate it, but what can you do. No one else’s hiring me,” Jean replied.

 

I felt really bad. Here I was, living a pretty good life, but Jean looked like he was really struggling. I didn’t know what to say to not sound like a complete dick.

 

“I’m sorry,” I said.

 

I had a period like that, but it got better for me. I just got nervous and messed up on my interviews a lot, but it wasn’t like I never had the chance.

 

“Hey, how long are you staying here for, maybe we can chat and catch up?” he suggested and my heart lifted a little.

“Yeah, of course! That’ll be great! I’m here until the 29th,” I said.

“You still have the same number?” he asked me. I nodded. Although I started to pay for my cell phone by myself, I still kept the number for convenience.

“I’ll text you then,” he told me.

“Okay, I’ll see you later, Jean.”

“Yeah, I have to run some errands before work today too. Bye, Marco,” he said, pushing his cart away.

 

I watched him leave and turn into a different aisle.

 

And with that, I was left alone with a soaring heart and nothing in my head except for Jean’s promise of a date. Well, not really a date, I guess. I got the rest of the things on the shopping list and checked out.

 

I drove home.

 

* * *

  

“I saw Jean,” I told my mother when I got home.

“How is he?” my mother asked.

“He looks really stressed out. He’s the manager now.”

 

My mother sighed and helped me unpack the groceries.

 

I was on edge that whole day. Jean didn’t text me. I didn’t text him. I just waited and felt more and more anxious as the time flew by.

 

It was only the next day really early in the morning that he texted me.

 

From: (XXX) XXX-XXXX

It’s Jean I have a day off the 27th

 

To: Jean

Okay, any time is good with me.

 

He didn’t say anything else. I waited and waited, but there was no other message. I guess he changed his number then. I wondered what was up with him. Oh well, he must be busy. After all, it’s Christmas Eve, is what I decided on. I helped my parents around the house with chores and preparing. Despite the fact that I came home for once, they were still having guests over in the evening.

 

It all started around 6 pm. People all around my parents’ ages started knocking on our door or ringing the doorbell. In half an hour, there were so many of them chatting it up and having a good time that I felt seriously choked. All of these people were practically senior citizens! Even though age doesn’t matter after high school, I still felt so out of place so I just left the house and took a walk around our neighborhood. It was freezing as hell and there was snow on the ground still. I always dreamed about having a white Christmas, but never like this.

 

I felt a vibration in my pocket and got out my phone. It was Jean.

 

From: Jean

I’ll pick you up at 12

 

To: Jean

Okay where are we going?

 

From: Jean

Work ttyl

 

I sighed, the air clouding up around as I breathed out. He really was busy all day then. I can’t believe his store is open right now. I wondered where he worked.

 

I trudged back home and excused myself from the party. I went upstairs to my old room, which was now a guest room, and plopped down on my bed. I went to sleep early that night.

 

* * *

  

On Christmas Day, I was awoken by my mother, who shook me awake saying, “Santa knew you were coming home so he brought the presents over here!”

 

I smiled sleepily and rubbed my eyes. My mother always said things like this on Christmas. It made me happy that I was home again.

 

“Alright,” I said, getting up. She left the room and I could hear shuffling downstairs in the living room. I dressed quickly, rubbing my arms for warmth. I checked my phone for the time (7:13 am) and it turned out that I had a new message from Jean.

 

From: Jean

Happy Christmas

 

To: Jean

You too!

 

I smiled. No one ever texted me things like that. Jean always made me feel really happy. I got on facebook to see if anything was new. My surgeon friends were having fun with their own families on Christmas. They had spouses and kids and I felt a bit jealous about it.

 

* * *

  

Time moved quickly now.

 

Jean rang the doorbell promptly at 12 o’clock. My mother answered the door.

 

“Marco!” she called to me who was already running down the stairs to the front door, “Jean’s here!”

 

I almost tripped going down the stairs. Jean looked incredibly attractive today. He shaved his beard which was a bit surprising. He dark circles weren’t as noticable. He looked happier and less tired. Jean was like himself from college. I smiled.

 

“Hey, Jean,” I said, “I’ll see you later, mom.”

 

I walked outside to Jean’s car parked in the driveway. It was the same car he had in college. I only saw it a couple of times when I spent time at his house back when he lived with his parents. It was really funny how we lived in the same city yet we only met in college.

 

“Same car,” I commented. It was more of a slip-of-the-tongue.

 

He didn’t say anything. He just put the car into reverse and backed out of the driveway. He drove me toward Downtown...He took me ice skating.

 

“Here, I’ll get the tickets,” he said going to the booth.

“You don’t have to! I can pay for myself!” I told him adamantly. I felt bad about it.

“Nah, it’s okay. I want to!” he insisted. I couldn’t really refuse.

 

He left to get the tickets and I stood around waiting. He took me ice skating. He. Took Me. Ice. Skating. Me. Ice Skating. Wow.

 

He came back with one of those wristband things for me. He had one on too. He put the wristband carefully on me to make sure none of the adhesive was stuck to me. He looked really cute, concentrating with his tongue sticking out and his eyes squinting a bit to get a better look.

 

“I, uh, heard, you’d never been ice skating before. I thought maybe you’d like to learn,” he said.

 

I blushed. I say that it was my dream date a long time ago on facebook. I didn’t know he paid attention to any of it.

 

“Thank you very much, Jean,” I told him, smiling.

 

He guided me down to the skate rental area and got me skates. He helped me put them on and tied them up for me. He said that they had to be as tied as tight as possible or it would hurt be more when I skated. Our eyes met while he said this. He smiled at me and I smiled back.

 

It felt like I was in a movie.

 

He helped me stand up on the skates and when I wobbled, he held me so I wouldn’t fall. He was being really nice to me. He had his own skates on too. I was surprised at his quickness. He walked me over to the entrance of the rink, holding my arm to catch me. I could barely stand on the skates. I wondered how I would be on the ice. He entered the rink first and held out his hand for me. I took it and slowly stepped onto the ice with my right foot.

 

Jean taught me how to skate. He held my hands to support me. I skated slowly forward and he inched backward in front of me, guiding my every step. I think I was starting to fall in love with him again.

 

“You wanna take a break?” he asked me, “You look a bit tired.”

 

I nodded and we left the rink and sat on some chairs set out around it.

 

“I can’t believe we saw each other again. I thought I lost you forever when you went to med school,” he said.

“Me too,” I agreed, “I really wanted to see you again. I’m glad we ran into each other when we did.”

 

I leaned my head on his shoulder and he accepted it.

 

“I never did get over you, you know,” I said.

“You were the one that left, idiot,” Jean leaned his own head on mine.

“I know. I didn’t want to go, but you know how education’s important in our family.”

“So you’re gonna go back after tomorrow?” he asked.

“Yeah…”

 

We sat like that a bit, leaning on each other. I didn’t want this moment to end. Jean was the perfect guy. He lifted his head from mine so I sat up as well.

 

“What’s up?” I asked.

 

He told me he was ready to go back on the ice. I smiled and agreed. He helped me back onto the ice and it was the most fun I’ve had in my whole life.

 

When we were done, we held hands back to his car and he opened the door for me like a gentleman. I sat down inside and he closed the door after me. He got into the driver’s seat. We laced our hands together in the car on the ride home. We only stopped holding hands when he had to park the car.

 

Jean took my hand back in his and smiled sweetly at me. I smiled back.

“I love you, you know. I never stopped even after you had left. I always have and I always will,” he said.

“I love you too,” I told him.

I grinned like a dork and he kissed my hand. I felt the same for him as I did in college, probably even more now.

 

We spent the last two days I was in Trost together and he came to see me off at the airport. I told him to look for a job in Jinae. He grinned like a fool and told me to wait for him. I said I would and we kissed. I said goodbye to my parents and got on the plane.

 

**Author's Note:**

> And, there we go! I hope you enjoyed it. This was actually supposed to be part 2 of a series, but I haven't written the first part yet. So stay tuned. Any feedback would really be appreciated.


End file.
